The Most Admired Woman in the World Is A Man

I saw my name next to hers and thought it was a mistake. 

I had just auditioned for The Tempest. I was looking at the cast list with a group of people who would soon become the company for the show. We had to prepare a monologue for the audition, and I ended up auditioning with a monologue spoken by Miranda, the only female character in the play. I just auditioned with that monologue because it was one of my favorite ones in the play. I didn’t think playing Miranda was conceivable. After all, I was competing with 8 female actors for the role. 

But there I was looking at a list with my name next to hers. Next thing I knew, I was in flowy pants and heels, we were staging scenes, this was really happening.

I had complex feelings while playing her. Women play men all of the time in plays, but I have only seen a few instances (aka one) of men playing women without it being some sort of joke. I came up with go-to comments just in case someone questioned my decision to play her. I thought I had to be overly feminine in order to be a “convincing” woman, and because of this, I felt stuck for a long time and questioned if I was really right for the role.

We had a guest artist come in to lead a movement workshop for the company. We did an exercise where we had to walk as one gender and then walk as a different gender. I was trying to walk like a woman. During the exercise, I started to get lazy and returned to my masculine stride. In the end, I found myself walking in a way that was equally feminine and masculine leading with my chest and my hips. I had found Miranda. She, like me, was someone who was more in the middle when it came to gender. After that rehearsal, I noticed it was easier for me to connect with her because there were aspects of me in her. 

I thought there was some sort of special acting trick I had to learn in order to play someone of a different gender. Through this process, I learned that there aren’t any special tricks, but there is something important to keep in mind:

Trust your director. They cast you as the role because they like the idea of you–your soul, your quirks, your personality–playing the role. Be yourself, and don’t question it for a second.

Jeremy Kalfus